Yearbook Nostalgia and the Artistic Quest to be Kind

12 responses to “Yearbook Nostalgia and the Artistic Quest to be Kind”

1. 

   Sue

   March 27, 2024

   I will try to do the homework soon, but felt the need to chime in. Our generation is full of survivors. Some bitter, some trying to ignore the trauma and move on. We’re getting older but we don’t feel as old as our parents seemed to be. I never felt like I fit in to any of the categories. I felt like a misfit. I was a pseudo brain since I was in honors math but not honors English, tried the jock thing in junior high, definitely not a princess in my jeans and tshirts. I guess that’s why I loved choir and our drama group. Theater let everyone in. As long as you were respectful to others. Mr. B didn’t put up with disrespect. There are still times in my mid-50s that I’m trying to find my niche.

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   1. 

      Pat Green

      March 27, 2024

      I get you and appreciate your comments. The one myth I will assault since we went to the same school and drama club is that individual results may vary. One of the kids duct taped at a cast party was hospitalized for suicidal ideation. We had bullies and a cast system. We had an in and an out. You were merely in.

      I had to bail out of a cast party because I was gonna be duct taped and left in a random lawn. I also know of at leat two cases of rape where the victims were shamed, a person with an eating disorder heavily judged for it, and a missing Walkman.

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      1. 

         Sue

         March 27, 2024

         Point taken. It wasn’t perfect. Like I said, a lot of trauma. Thankfully some traditions were stopped, I hope for good. Even though I was “in”, I still felt like an outsider at times. Hard to explain.

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         1. 

            Pat Green

            March 27, 2024

            Now that I get completely! Thank you!

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            1. 

               Sue

               March 27, 2024

               An interesting side note: I’m the yearbook sponsor for our elementary schools this year. lol

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               1. 

                  Pat Green

                  March 28, 2024

                  I love that. As I said in the article, I think it is amazing that a student run event creates memories that last lifetimes and even generations. I have my dad’s year book and it is amazing. To get to be a part of it with students is wondrous and I may envy you a bit. It is an everlasting art form done by kids. That is pretty spectacular.

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2. 

   Dùghlas

   March 27, 2024

   i know where my yearbooks are. i was on the yearbook committee, which lead me to be join yearbook at bible college, which ultimately lead me to become yearbook editor in university. i even convinced the student council to invest in a SLR with a 300mm lens. i used that for both yearbook and the student newspaper. i like to say that i got an informal degree in journalism which getting my BA.

   back to high school, i tried to fly under the radar, but also tried to fit in as much as all-in Pentecostal kid could fit in. i wasn’t cut from the basketball team because i was a senior. i wasn’t any good on the court, but i was vocal from the bench. i had heart but no sports talent yet lots of tenacity.

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   1. 

      Pat Green

      March 28, 2024

      We do not have to be good at all things to enjoy being a part of it. But the yearbook story is fascinating. I truly feel the art of the yearbook that creates a lifetime of memories that is student led is an artform that last that is underappreciated. You were a part of that.

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3. 

   Michelle

   March 27, 2024

   I only have one yearbook. (Grade 9) I had to drop out for a year. When I went back it was in an adult re-entry program and there were no yearbooks. 🙁
   I looked through it and remember that for that one year I was the pariah / brain. It was rough. But when I went back, I could fully be myself and was more of a brain / princess.
   Also with the benefit of time I can see that each of us were no one thing, and that given the chance and safe spaces, we could grow and express ourselves more fully. Unfortunately, not everyone was given that chance. 🙁

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   1. 

      Pat Green

      March 28, 2024

      That has some heartbreak to it as I read it and I hope that does not come off poorly the way I said it. I cannot tell you how much I appreciate your addition as it gives me pause and a reminder that not everyone experiences everything that others do and that is okay and we need to be mindful and cognizant of that in conversations. Thank you for your comment and the reminder and your transparency and vulnerability and beauty.

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4. 

   Deanna

   April 19, 2024

   It was really easy to look for photos and grab my yearbooks recently after our friend Erika passed away. I remembered her mentioning my ribbon barrettes and went on my own personal mission to find images that I thought I had of our childhood. I stumbled on to many other things/memories that I had forgotten about. I once gave a member of the yearbook committee a photo of our choir director in a Burger King crown because I was told the photo would be put in the yearbook. One of the musical group photos started because my mother was taking a picture of me and someone else. We are the center of the group picture. Good memories? Yes, mostly.

   But yearbooks, like our camera rolls and memories, are nostalgia. There is good mixed with the bad. My middle school years were hard. My home life was not great. As a result, I became withdrawn. I never felt like I fit in during high school. I was in the honor society, but I didn’t buckle down with my academic capabilities until sophomore year. I wasn’t a ‘brain’. I wasn’t good at sports. I tried, though. I ran track and managed the cross country team, but I wasn’t an ‘athlete’. As for being a ‘basketcase’, fear of high school rejection left me in that frame of mind for a long time. No one liked me in middle school. Who was going to like me in high school? High school eventually got better. Kids literally nicknamed me ‘princess’ in school and I don’t remember why. But, I loved it. Doing anything ‘criminal’ never occurred to me for fear of getting my butt beat at home.

   I’d like to join the claim of others and say drama was where we all fit in. Maybe there was more acceptance and less judgment in that environment, I don’t know. I don’t remember the duct tape incidents and hazing. I do remember, though, two guys threatening to rape me at a cast party. They were bigger than me and scary in that instant. They grew up to be men that I’ve seen complimented and are admired by others. I don’t see them in the same light. It’s all perception, I guess.

   Working in the school environment for many years, I’ve been on a few yearbook committees. It’s fun to be creative. I wrote a great message for our graduating seniors in 2020; whom we couldn’t well wish in person. It’s fun to put in a project what we think is important or a good memory for years to come.

   As Gen Xers, we were latchkey kids, we were the first generation to grow up with cable TV, and we saw the emergence of computers. We like to think we are independent and resourceful. We witnessed space shuttle development, the fall of the Berlin Wall, the war on drugs, the energy crisis, and multiple recessions. The expectations placed upon us were pretty high and I think we expect the same of future generations.

   I think we continue to choose to remember the good and live in the land of nostalgia, though. We aren’t any better than anyone else. We are all still trying our best to fit in; or at least I am anyway. Younger generations have many advantages/opportunities we didn’t have. Their structure is different and Covid changed societal expectations. Maybe our expectations should reflect that. Now, get off my lawn! Lol.

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   1. 

      Pat Green

      April 19, 2024

      This may very well be the most poignant and important comment that cuts to the heart of the “other side” side of nostalgia that matters today. The Byer brothers in Stranger Things have a nostalgic bond with the Clash song “Should I stay or should I go”. They were together in a room while the parents are fighting in the other so Jonathon cranks up the volume. And when we shame the next Gen they may very well find their clash song to be nostalgic about and the chain goes on or we can break it.

      Your truth of the event horrified me and I know that I know that I know the two men without knowing who. And I hope that somehow I am not one of the ones cheering them on today and I desperately hope that I was not a silent witness to the event. And that is a selfish hope. TO not be complicit.

      I hate this pain for you contained int he reflection, but I am so grateful you commented. Thank you! Truly! Thank you!

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